Posts: 2 | Joined: 10th Aug 06
Hi everyone. I am new to this board, so please forgive any mistakes.
I am 28 weeks preg today with my first child. This pregnancy is a miracle as I was told after many failed attempts of fertility treatment (I have PCOS, Endometriosis and severe Obesity) that I would never be a pregnant woman.
In my first 5 and half months I threw up every single thing I ate or drank and now I have been diagnosed with SPD (symphasis Pubis Dysfunction). Its agony. I feel I have been kicked between the legs with steel toe cap boots. My legs hurt, as to my back, pelvis and everything else. Getting a good nights sleep is an impossibility.
My emotions are running wild and I was also diagnosed as having depression in my pregnancy.
I feel a total cow towards my husband, he and anyone else I just snarl and shout at. All I do is cry, be in pain and worry about my baby. I honestly didn't know pregnancy could be so painful in so many ways.
I feel a constant guilt because after all these years of being desperate for a child, I am now carrying a miracle, but I have to say I almost borderline hate being pregnant. Even the feeling of my baby kicking and moving is agony because of the SPD.
I don't feel normal, I feel a freak and I feel I daren't share any of this with anyone I know in fear of being judged or letting anyone down.
I'm sorry to have gone on so long, it all just came puring out as I reach for yet another tissue to wipe my tearing eyes.
But, I do Thank you for listening.